09/15/21 >>  last night i dreamt i danced with david bowie and he kissed me *sobs* it was so beautiful
09/14/21 >>  sorry for not updating for so long! i'm taking online classes right now so that takes up a good majority of my time. in other news, i got a new tattoo last thursday :-) this is how it looked after it was finished, it's healing pretty nicely. it's been five days since i got it so it's in the peeling stage lol. the brown looks quite loud in this picture but it's actually faded a bit so it looks more like the original yoshitomo nara art. but yeah other than that nothing has really been going on... which is okay with me! i like having nothing to do haha

08/29/21 >>  last night i had a dream where david byrne was my teacher (i called him "dr. byrne" lol) and i was his favorite student if ya catch my drift! but anyway i didn't dream of anything... obscene, just him staring, standing close to me, and words of affirmation. i think i like dreams like that more than something explicit. i feel like being close to someone is more intimate
i had another dream and danny elfman was there... but i that's all i remember. lots of hunky music men in my dreams last night
08/28/21 >>  i've been having really bad dissociative episodes for about a year now and they only get worse. i spend probably about half of the time i'm awake dissociating. i think it's stress but i'm worried that if i don't seek help it'll only progress. it's a scary feeling. it's like i'm watching myself through a lens inside my body. i know i'm here, but i don't feel like i am. like i'm not grounded in reality mentally
08/11/21 >>  last night, i dreamt that i was being lured down to a basement by herbert west. he was filling a wine glass in his hand, and he had something to show me. he told me he finished the work i had to get done and we should go to a hotel. then i see the "work" that he was talking about; blocks of wood stacked to look like a house with trees drawn in pencil on the sides. he said if it comes down to it it could be burned down to keep us warm. i was so thankful and happy. alas, that is where the dream ended...